It is official. This sux. Ok, I’m done.
I am knackered. Today I had so many thoughts and I did write some down in my notebook too. Not that y’all should care about that, but hey…
And I decided to post a short text, although I can barely keep my eyes open and I have to wake up really early in the mornin, and then my stupid puter decided to erase everything… Saved? No, of course not… WordPress usually saves drafts on its own… Not this time too, but anyway… Where was I? Yeah… In this God forsaken town… Well…
Here are some things a cynical one learns when they are being nice.
I swear I tried to be nice and except for a few swears on the wheel (because traffic here is like the worst in the whole universe), that nobody heard, and a fight with a person I fight with everyday which I swear was almost unavoidable, especially because I’m knackered and irritated, I sort of managed to be nice today. So here goes nothing…
1. When you just SHUT UP (to quote on Carrie Bradshaw) you have a chance of hearing things you might never hear otherwise (DON’T READ WHAT’S BETWEEN BRACKETS – although that’s kind of hard for me, cause I’ve developed this selective hearing – as in blocking my ears when someone’s monologue goes to things I don’t care of – which happens very often -, and concentrating on something else. It has its disadvantages though, as it lasts for a while, most likely until the subject has been changed and I might lose precious information, lol, bygone anyway).
2. For the cynical one, being nice for a while is like having a huge amount of coffee for the regular person. You just build up pressure inside until you can’t help but jump around.
3. No special attitudes from people have been sensed, which must be evidence that I’m usually nice to most people (even if I’m nice to some just because I don’t wanna get into trouble or more like don’t feel like it. Anyhow, I dislike fighting against windmills so I just shut up. Closing my ears works just dandy too.) Besides… It’s hard not to be nice to people, when my childhood role model is this dude:
4. Once a coward, always a coward. Being nice doesn’t mean you shouldn’t stand up for yourself when someone tries to run all over you. So if you don’t stand up, it means you’re rather more of a coward than of a nice person. Because, admit it, you would like to stand up. I’d like to be a vigilante. Sigh. A dream which will never come true I think.
Later edit: WordPress did save some draft. 
Don’t see more for now, maybe didn’t notice… However… Tomorrow I’m gonna try and be even nicer and maybe have no fights at all. =))) Also will smile a lot.
So, as I said, I will be back soon with more thoughts. Plenty of time. It’s not like we all die. I will speak of cravings soon. It keeps on mesmerizing me.
Oh and one last thought… I’m crushin’ on Starbucks. Sigh.
And one last, last thought… I have to thank Heath Ledger for throwing the visits to this blog into nonsense. Everybody seems to be searchin’ for the joker these days. Why so serious, people? Kudos!
I definitely wanted to comment on your first day observations however last night was not a good night (first day back at class, which was a long day).
This actually will seem more like a question then a comment, but do you think that behavior is directly based on external factors of others or inner factors as more of a, “inner projection” of yourself. Meaning if you see within yourself that you are kindness or the body is enacting kindness that kindness is going to attract kindness?
That’s a very hard question you’re asking. I’m sure there are studies on that. LOL So I’m just going to give my personal belief, based on nothing but personal things.
I don’t think it’s necessarily an inner thing. If you see yourself as beautiful, will you attract beauty? And if you see yourself as Angelina Jolie, will you attract Brad Pitt? LOL
I suppose that on some extent the way you see yourself may attract such things, but… It’s more of a combination between how you see yourself and the others perception on you.
Because, as I have learnt yesterday, it’s extremely easy for a regular person (whatever that means, I mostly mean someone who isn’t mental, although we’re all kind of mental in some ways) to be nice to someone who’s nice to them. It’s easy to be kind, when you’re surrounded with kindness. However it’s hard to be nice to people who step on your toes, whichever their reasons are.
However… I had the opportunity to meet a person at some point who was kindness itself. It was like they’ve never been hurt, ever. And I must say that they mostly attracted kindness in return… But I do believe they got to the point where love and kindness were flowing out of them as a natural state of being. And that is extremely hard to do, if you ask me.
I don’t know if this made any sense… I’m quite tired right now.
haha, yeah that made plenty of sense and I definitely see where you’re coming from, but back when I believe in a lot of concepts about love and what love might be it was stated that love attracted love, and it seemed to be true my in the bodies case. When all you could do is give love to others there was nothing fueling other emotions from the external point of view so it totally extinguished any thought of an action that may negate love. However, merely trying to be love leaves a large loop hole, because this is only a concept and it still justify some type of goal at the end, which doesn’t bring out a True Nature in someone. Considering it is only a concept it is only a fraction of the Truth, and thus will come and go.
By the way, I’m glad that you would give your personal experience over a study, I’m not interested in second hand knowledge (although your knowledge to me becomes second hand, funny how that works. =P) but wanted to hear your stand point on it!
Heres a thought, if you can’t possible see yourself as an individual but rather a fraction of the whole, that everyone and everything in the universe is this whole, then how can you possibly be anything more than Love for the Self? Wouldn’t it be that the inner emotion that is felt (or seemingly felt) be projected outwardly toward all things. This seems to be something that rings true in almost all everyday things, like as a simple example, just waking up in the morning, the day will be beautiful regardless if its raining or sunny out (i love rain just as i love the sun
). So in effect everything is perceived on your side as being beautiful. Now given that people are manifested as many there are going to be people that are going to appear distraught, but the effect that you have inwardly with yourself (smiling probably outwardly on your part) will have an affect on them, given it signifies total acceptance of the state. That’s why I’m merely interested in your experiment because I think for you it’s very important to find this out! It’ll bring you back to yourself, and isn’t that what we’re meant here to do. Thats probably the best way to be wealthy in the world is to know yourself.
I am interested in hearing your story about kindness though, I take it you met a guru at some point, but i could be mistaken. Its merely seeing the false as false and the states as mere states and only fractions of the truth. By saying its difficult easily points to how simple it is, because the two words merely come from the same living root, what was the word before it was labeled a word right? <3
I have no idea on what to answer to that.
haha, its okay, sometimes thoughts just tend to flow out with no chance of stopping.
I apologize if it doesn’t make sense or you don’t agree, i wouldn’t take it personal (how could I anyway? =])
I really enjoy your posts though! ^^
It’s not that I don’t agree, just that I didn’t understand much.
I am glad you like my posts.
haha, well if you need clarification, i can try and help or have any questions just shoot me a post or something!
I’ll snoop around from time to time if you don’t mind ^_^
I hope i haven’t bugged or upset you, if i do, just let me know, i want to be respectful of your reality. =]
Yup, sorry. Of course you haven’t bugged me. I’m just havin’ a bad time right now… Nothing much to say, nor can think about much. Soz…
Do stop by, please… When my mind will be out of the gutter, I’ll surely have some more questions.
Don’t know when it’ll happen though.