This is the second text in the “moments of my life” cathegory. 
It’s raining and I miss him. Haven’t missed him this bad in ages. But I’m listening to Belinda Carlisle’s – Heaven is a place on earth… And this song simply says his name, together with the rain outside. I feel like poofing myself. As in getting a magic wand and poofing all around me so I’d make myself all better and turn back time. For all the love, the aromas, the gorgeous rainy mornings, the feeling of greatness. For the dream, for that perfect moment that I totally screwed up. And I’m biting my lip thinking all that greatness must be stashed somewhere inside of me. In one little place. A place that will never be open for visits again. Not necessarily because I don’t want to, but because finding what I found then… Well that’s very hard and highly unlikely. Looking left, looking right. Freezing. Freeze. Right there. Don’t move one muscle. Can you feel it all over again? That precious moment when you were… in love?
Right now I’d give pretty much anything to turn back time. Actually this has been going on for over a year. For different reasons, but even so, in the past two years, there’ve been only two reasons (which I won’t mention right now) for which I wanted to turn back time. I never wanted to turn back time before.
I miss him. I really do. With all his greatness, energy, goodness and every part of him.
But I miss him in a very good way. It almost doesn’t hurt. It’s like remembering the most beautiful thing from the past. You’re a bit sad that it’s not here anymore, but nevertheless happy that you had a chance at experiencing something so great. Someone so great.
And it all started with someone at the supermarket who smelled of two days old musk oil (left open). Funny how one scent can bring back so many memories. And even funnier that I’ve never used that scent with him, nor did he smell like that. But the scent brought back thoughts of misty rainy mornings. One thing led to another and here I am yet again. 
And yeah… That’s about it. Sorry for posting once every blue moon. Also if you feel like listening the two songs reminding me of him, they can be found here.
What else? Nothing. I just wish I could carve this feeling into my heart, even if it would hurt having it all the time yet lacking his presence.
And a white rose bouquet… For him. For all the moments he made me feel like Heaven was a place on earth. For all the beautiful things he showed me. For all the times I felt my heart found perfection. For all the beautiful memories. For him never ceasing to amaze me. For him being a prince. For the undying hope for goodness he seeded in my heart. For him granting me the shot at knowing such goodness exists. For all those things and so much more… I love you. In the purest way ever.
