Speaking of which… I love country music. I do. Not all of it, but lots of songs, especially Tracy Lawrence songs. Here are three other songs I really like (not Tracy’s): Martina McBride – I just call you mine, Sarah Buxton – Space and Reba McEntire – Consider me gone .

Also… Two nights ago I heard an Elvis song… I jus’ melt when he says “along the way” at 1.53. Awwwwwwwwww.

The clock by the bed is ticking too loud in the quiet night
I lie in the darkness thinking I must go before it’s light
Before you open up your eyes and you beg me to stay
I’ll leave ’cause I can’t stand to see you hurt this way
Sleep my love as I kiss you goodbye
Then I won’t hear the sound of your cry

Though I knew the time was coming and our love would end somehow
I just couldn’t bear to tell you exactly just when or how
I know we can’t go on, that it was wrong to start
But if you wake up crying now, you’ll break my heart
Sleep my love as I kiss you goodbye
Then I won’t hear the sound of your cry

Ohhhh, Sleep my love as I kiss you, kiss you goodbye
Then I won’t hear the sound of your cry

Ohhhh, Sleep my love as I kiss you, kiss you, kiss you goodbye
Then I won’t hear the sound of your cry

Ohhhh, Sleep my love as I kiss you goodbye
Then I won’t hear the sound of your cry

“Holly leaves and Christmas trees used to mean so much to me…”

When angels lose their wings, the Heavens weep.

I have promised the angel I’d never use whining to express their grief and sorrow, therefore I trust you to not see the painting as that. Angels don’t whine. Their suffering is stoic and just. A great honor was bestowed upon us and so is their punishment if they shall fail.

When they lose their wings it’s not a question of physical, but of mental pain. Their truth, their whole world colapse.

The painting

There was the angel. Once upon a time they stood strong in the land of the mighty. Now they were flesh. The aura once surrounding their presence easily faded away and they were thrown into a world of storms. Storms they could not control, they could not recognize. They could not bring out the sun to warm up the earth anymore. “And the north wind blew and blew, and the harder he’d blow, the more the man would hold on to his coat, bringing it even closer to his body.”

Their blue eyes once showing the silver lining were now full of tears. Pondering that single moment when they have failed. That moment which made their wings turn into dust.

Now they were sick. Sickeningly human. They could feel all the flaws and the world that was unknown to them until that time.

The face once filled with kindness, now held nothing but grief. Not to losing their wings, but to throwing the truth away.

They realized it was only perception which held everything high or low and that made it even more sickening. For they knew they’d eventually mold into the new world presented to them and forget all about righteousness.  And there was an even larger grief on that, than the grief itself. They’d rather hurt forever and not forget, than comfort the pain.

The pain was well deserved. They knew it and gladly embraced the sorrow as a price for their deeds. But that feeling, that one feeling which made their flesh hurt… It wasn’t their nature. They never wanted to eat the apple. Yet they gave in… And that miserable moment torn apart their greatness.

They would say such sorrow was never known before to man kind but they knew it wasn’t true. Such sorrow was never known to the angel kind.

Lost, in a world that wasn’t theirs, they could only hope that “some other time, and some other place, with love in their hearts and a smile on their face” the other angels would welcome the fallen ones once again and hold them under their wings. Hold them until they’d recover their own. Holding with peace, greatness, joy, and the feeling of belonging. That feeling they now so desperately craved for, in such a humanly way. Circling their presence with a forgiving kindness, which would allow the fallen ones to return to their loved kind.

And that day they fell among us and are now wandering the earth. “Trying to make right what once went wrong.” And with the single thought that maybe, just maybe, someday they’d be back with their own kind.

(“The day she went away I made myself a promise, that I’d soon forget we’ve ever met… But somethin’ sure is wrong, cause I’m so blue and lonely, I forgot to remember to forget.” Just a song from my mind, jumpin’ on the page, not connected to mr. Hobson).

I remember how I used to love Early Edition and his shirts, t-shirts (always worn together) and coats. GOD were they lovely. And the way he totally disliked the cat and pouted in a lovely way  and made that cute grin when he was scared of something.  You’re missed mr. Chandler! xxx

I like people who will fight to death for what they want and/or for what they think to be right. I like archangels and I’m a sucker for heroes and glory. Total sucker for “the man”, “the woman”, “the ONE”, “Neo”.

And I know I recently wrote that maybe it’s time to be less unique and more the same, but today I’m giving in to the adrenaline rush and the “opposite effect” (that thing about opposites giving contrast to each other).

I have no idea why I’m writing this. Whenever I write I search for answers for my questions and guidance towards my truth. Right now I should be searching for an answer to why I like such people. But I really don’t care about the reason. I just like them… So this is like an homage…

To De Niro’s character in “Men of Honor”.

To all vigilantes out there, such as Mr. Madsen in “Vengeance Unlimited”…

(…) And Jodie Foster in “The brave one”

To all people who break the rules in a good way and to those who stick to the rules and vows and honor.

To those who stand “where the eagles fly” and lift themselves up where they belong.

To all people who protect other souls.

To Brad Pitt in Fight club (although he was kind of cuckoo) and to Angelina Jolie (just for being herself).

To all men and women who find power through sexuality.

To all the brave knights and Robin Hoods out there.

To John Malkovich in “Dangerous Liaisons” and “Rounders”.

To Christian Bale who is a monument of power and cockiness in most of his flicks, not to mention that he’s as gorgeous and hawt as someone can possibly be. M-wow!

To my lovely Benton Fraser, in Due South (my top role model).

To Dr. Cox, who’s still a hero and one cocky doctor too, lol.

And to the gorgeous and feared Stormie in Monk’s “Shootout in Taos”.

To the ones who can concentrate for hours… Also the ones who have frozen their feelings… But most of all to the ones who love like they’ve never been hurt, for they do exist. And they’re either masochists or some of the bravest people I know.

And most of all to my dad who was the strongest person I’ve ever met. God bless you, dearest!

To all of them I bow (as Elvis would say it, “to such a man I’d bow”) and wish I were more like them. Thank you for raising my dreams up high, “where the eagles fly”, and being part of my life!

p.s. One of my most intimate wishes is to reach out my hand to someone, as a firefighter perhaps, and say “Gimme your hand, ma’am!” To all of them I bow.